Mar

Today is the first day of the rest of my life…well, that’s a *little* extreme, I guess! %-) Yesterday I went to the doctor for my post-op/post-partum checkup, and received a clean bill of health. I can now safely resume all of my regular activities – Craig is *very* pleased!!!

I am still supposed to take it easy in terms of driving, and also I am still not supposed to do high-impact exercise; but both of these are really just a matter of comfort, not a medical reason. I continue to be surprised at how much tenderness and soreness there is around the incision. I really expected it to be all healed by now. The doctor said it could take 3 months for the pain to go away completely. Kathi (Craig’s sister, for those of you who don’t know her) had a c-section with one of her kids, and she agrees that the pain lasts a long time. She says you finally just get used to being in pain all the time, and then finally after months pass, you wake up one day and realize it’s gone. Sigh…

It is true that driving causes more discomfort than other things, especially since I have a stick shift in my car. I am going to have to drive, though, since the next academic quarter starts on Friday, and so it’s back to work for me…

I have really mixed feelings about leaving Sami. She will be staying home with Craig for the time being – we have decided to trade off days until she’s about 5 months old, and then put her in daycare before stranger anxiety sets in. This works for us since we each only have to go into our offices 2 or 3 days per week, and can work at home the rest of the time. Anyway, I have been starting to go a little stir crazy being at home virtually 24/7 for five weeks, so it will be good to go back to my “normal” life (as if such a thing is *really* possible post-baby! %-). But I worry that she will start liking the bottle better than nursing, that she will achieve all her milestones while I’m gone, etc. I guess this is a good example of MBD!

Okay, time to go feed my baby…

  

Feb

Well, the wait is over! If you haven’t already heard, Samara Rachel (pronounced like Raquel, as in”Welch”) Kirith made her entry into the world at 6:10 p.m. on Saturday, Feb 10, 2001. She weight in at 8 pounds, 10 ounces and measured 20.5 inches. 1 and 5 minute APGARs were 8 and 9, respectively.

I guess this means I win the multi-million $$ pool! Now if all the rest of you who took part in the pool would forward my your $100,000, that would be great! (What, we forgot to mention that part of the deal? … %-)

Leslie and I both, of course, are walking on air! Sami, as we will likely call her is a delight. She shows signs both of being willful and strong (on the physical side, she already raises her head quite well), but also is of a very pleasant disposition, and soothes easily. We are thrilled as we enter this process of getting to know her, and starting to watch and help her develop.

I have to say though, I am extremely proud of Leslie and how she is handling things. The birth was not at all according to her “birth plan” — natural birth with minimal pharacological aids, etc. Instead, because Sami was already quite a bit past her due date, we decided to induce. However, Leslie’s body was not ready for labor, and so things never really got off the ground — the attempts to begin labor ended up in an extended series of nearly constant, very painful, but equally nonproductive contractions — this led to Leslie deciding on an epidural afterall (and after watching what it did, my revised attitude is that modern epidurals are *good!*), and then when things still didn’t progress, we needed to opt for a cesarian birth.

This could have resulted in a lot of disappointment for both of us. However, Leslie, although disappointed that things didn’t go our way, is staying very focused on our beautiful new, healthy baby (as am I), and despite the pain, fatigue, etc., of having to recover from essentially unwanted major surgery, she is focussing on how the end result is *exactly* what we want, rather than thinking about all the things that didn’t go as planned along the way. A supremely healthy and positive attitude , I think. Also, although at this moment, Leslie is in much pain and discomfort, she is maintaining an incredibly calm and positive attitude, and is very agressively and actively forcing herself to do the often painful things that will speed up her recovery.

My hat is off to you, Leslie!

Now, instead of babbling here, I should get back to my two women! So, more later …

  

Feb

Well, the waiting continues. I think Leslie is having somewhat more frequent, and slightly more intense contractions, so the pre-labor is in full steam — but no real indication yet that the main event is imminent.

If things hold off until late tomorrow, for a Saturday delivery, then I will win the multi-million $$ pool from our website, so I can hope for that. But Leslie and I both would like to see this young’n emerge before induction-type steps need to be taken!

I have to say, though, that these past few days of intense waiting have been pretty special. Leslie and I have gone on walks together every day, gone out to lunch, and stuff like that — sharing our anticipation, and yes, anxiety. We might both have preferred little _____________ to have arrived by now, but later, I think we will look back at this past week or so as a special period of bonding and such for us!

Well, that’s my 2¢ for now. I will be eager to hear what the Dr. has to say first thing tomorrow morning — but for now it’s the zzzzzzzz’s for me!

  

Feb

Ah, another day…another day on which my stubborn daughter-to-be will no doubt refuse to be born! Sigh… Clearly, the child has inherited both Craig’s *and* my slightly strong-willed inclinations. We are going to have our hands full! Presuming, of course, that she ever decides to be born…

I have now tried EVERYTHING that people have suggested to me as ways to induce labor, all to no avail. Naturally, Craig likes some of the induction-attempts better than others – he says it’s like we’re newleyweds again! Yesterday we even broke down and went to the drugstore in search of castor oil. Interesting product – it really is oil! I hadn’t even heard of it prior to this, but my grandmother and others recommended drinking it to try to get contractions started. I confirmed with a nurse aquantaince of ours that it wouldn’t kill me (though she maintained that Craig’s favorite induction attempt is much more likely to work . So, last night I poured a tablespoon of it into a half glass of cranberry juice, and then stared at it for a *really* long time. You know how you learn in chemistry that oil and water don’t mix? Well, oil and cranberry juice don’t either – the oil just kind of sat on top of the juice, no matter how much I stirred. It almost made me sick just *looking* at it. Finally, I got up the nerve to drink it, then went to bed happily assuming I would be having contractions within a few hours. And…nothing happened. NOTHING!!!

In terms of more concrete medical news – at the doc’s on Monday, I was maybe a nanometer more dilated than last time, but still not quite to 2 cm. (Last time I was barely 1 – Craig spins this as progress! %-). I was depressed after that, but the fact is, she is still only two days late – I can’t legitimately complain too much. The doctor won’t be inducing me this week, which is good because (though it would’ve gotten it over with) that would’ve made me nervous. If the induction doesn’t work, you have to have a c-section; and, while that is certainly not a tragedy, it is something we want to avoid if we can. Anyway, you are supposed to be dilated to at least 2 cm on your own before they induce. I go back on Friday to get checked again, and so they can do a non-stress test on the baby (they give me candy and juice and then see how much she moves in half an hour – they do this to make sure she is still okay in there, since once you go past your due date there can be problems with the placenta, etc.). The current plan is that next Monday night I will go into the hospital and they will give me some gel to soften my cervix, then on Tuesday morning they will give me an injection to induce contractions. So, everyone send contracting vibes my way, and hope the brat (oh, I mean baby! decides to come on her own before then!

Not much else to report – Craig has been very supportive of my mood swings the last few days, and very patient with my sucking up all the badnwidth from our cable modem to download songs from the internet. We’ve been going for walks every day, at a little trail near our house – interesting, because it’s been 55-60 degrees here the last few days, and today and tomorrow it might get up to 70! How bizarre would it be if my baby was born on a 70 degree day in *February*?!!

By the way, I want to say a BIG thank you to all the people who have been emailing me and calling me to check in – outside social contact helps *a lot*, and I really appreciate the distraction!

  

Feb

And now it is a waiting game. Leslie’s body is giving off all sorts of signs that the baby will be coming soon. More and harder contractions, and a bunch of other clinical details, of which we can probably spare you. However, after a couple of “false alarms” — on which a series of promising contractions fizzled out — Leslie is becoming a bit discouraged, and convinced that the baby is “never going to come.” Of course she will, and first babies are often late — but it a little tough for Leslie to maintain a positive outlook — especially since those “clinical details” I referred to above, like very sore hips, are quite uncomfortable. I think she is doing a wonderful job, though!

In any event, we are about to visit the Dr. for a checkup to see how things are progressing, and I’m sure that one of us will check in with the news from that in a bit …

  

Feb

Today is Craig’s first day of “paternity leave” – he doesn’t have to teach again until after Vanderbilt’s Spring Break. We are both glad that he is going to be able to stay home with the baby for a while, too. We are also both wondering how long it will take us to start wearing on each other’s nerves, being home all the time…;-)

Of course, this presumes that there even *is* going to be a baby, which I am starting to doubt – I really think I might just stay pregnant forever! I’ve been employing as many of the old wives’ tales about how to induce labor as I can, though I haven’t quite been able to bring myself to track down something named castor oil and try to drink it – somehow, that just doesn’t sound appealing. But I have tried just about everything else, and so far – nada.

Now the doc is talking about inducing me one day next week. In some ways, this is appealing – I really am kind of sick of being pregnant, in case you haven’t gotten that from reading these little notes! Still, it makes me uneasy – my gut tells me the baby will come when she’s ready, and I shouldn’t rush her. Anyone have any personal experiences with labor induction? I’d be interested in hearing about it.

Today I’ve been experimenting with mp3 files. I got the idea to make a CD of the songs that people have been recommending for me to listen to during labor; but some of them are kind of random, things that might be fun for this purpose, but I probably don’t need a whole CD of, etc. So, I thought I would try to find them as mp3 files, to see if I like them, etc. I was just using the browser to search, which ended up being a real pain. I was starting to wonder what all the fuss was about. But then I downloaded a special program that searches for the files via napster and gnutella servers, and it was much easier after that.

Well, that’s pretty much my news of the day. Still no contractions to speak of – just small ones every now and again. The doctor is going out of town this weekend, so the baby will probably decide to come then! Otherwise, we got back to the doc on Monday and talk about this whole induction thing. Everyone please send contraction-vibes my way!

We’re off to try to track down some Girl Scouts now – rumor has it they are selling cookies at Kroger this week, and suddenly I am really craving those ones with the coconut and caramel…

  

Jan

OK, So today was an exciting day. Leslie woke up thinking that things were “different” – and in fact she had contractions with some regularity all day — small ones, but every 20 minutes or so — give or take a little bit. A clear sign that her body is on the move!

This afternoon we went to the Dr.s’ office for her regular checkup — Leslie was only dialated a centimeter, which I think she found to be a little bit diheartening — but it *is* progress. The “best” part, though, is that we learned that we are going to have a very contrary kid. Leslie had been a little concerned because the baby was now moving a bit less than she had been recently. She mentioned this to the Dr. –who then put Leslie on a fetal monitor to make sure all was OK — looking for signs of movement from the baby. Well, for a bout 20 minutes there was nothing — a very strong steady heartbeat — but no movement whatsoever. This even after they had stuffed Leslie with OJ and chocolate to give the kid a sugar high and make her hyper! In the end, the kid did move a fair bit, and the Dr. pronounced things A-OK. The best part though — once we had left the office, and no longer needed her to be moving on “demand,” our sweet little girl started doing her favorite tricks — head-butting mommy’s bladder while kicking her in the ribs — almost nonstop for 30 minutes, and then regularly thereafter! Our sweet little girl-to-be is showing very early signs of being very willful and contrary! (I guess she takes after her mom! %-)

  

Jan

Well, the bag for the hospital is packed, the baby’s room is all set, the only thing left to do now is clean the house so that when Grandma comes to visit the new baby she won’t think I’m a slob! In case it isn’t clear from the above – I am *so* ready for this baby to COME OUT!!!

I was having fun being pregnant – well, except for the stupid people who feel like they can touch me and ask me all kinds of personal questions and give me all kinds of unwanted (and usually bizarre) advice just because I am pregnant. But, starting in the last few days, it has become…well, a pain (literally). I have forgotten what it feels like to *not* have a backache, the itching has returned (though not quite as bad as earlier this trimester), and my hips hurt so much I can sometimes barely stand up! And, of course, I haven’t been able to sleep for more than 3 hours at a time for…a long, long time. I guess that probably will only get *worse* once the baby comes, though!

While I’m in whine-mode – really the worst part about it now is the waiting. I AM BORED!!! Even though I *do* have things I *could* do, I am finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate. So reading or working is quite difficult. Mainly now I find some excuse every day to go to the mall and wander around for a while. Today, I got a manicure and pedicure – I feel certain the delivery will go much more smoothly now that my nails are perfect, and I can look down at the stirrups and see my pretty red toenails! %-)

Incidentally, I am also collecting parenting advice – as much as I can get. So, if you have kids and you have any suggestions for Craig and me, please email us. Not only will I appreciate the advice, I will *really* appreciate the social contact, now that I am supposed to be “resting” all the time. Also, if you are single and/or child-free and you have advice about things we absolutely should not forget about being footloose and fancy-free, we’re interested in that, too. We don’t want to become old foggies *too* quickly!

  

Jan

Ah yes. Maternal Brain Damage! This phenomenon was pointed out to me by my very good friend Greg McHugo — It is believed to be caused by the hormonal changes associated with pregnancy — but especially by the high levels of pitocin excreted during labor (i.s., if Leslie is showing signs now, … %-). In any event, this Brain Damage makes moms very (some would say overly) protective of their young — to dote on them, etc., the way that self-respecting dads — even the most lovin of us don’t. This Brain Damage can be quite amusing to watch, as long as you know what’s going on — and as long as the victim of it has a good sense of humor (As I believe/hope that Leslie does)!! Some women become violent towards you if you point out their MBD-related behaviors. More on Leslie’s developing case, I’m sure, as it develops.

On other fronts, we have signs that Leslie’s body is starting to prepare itself for labor. Most recently her hip hurt — which we think means that the cartelage is softening to increase flexibility to make way for the baby. An amazing set of coordinated changes if you think about it — even though they don’t appear to be all that fun to go through!

In terms of the timing, I would like to make it through Tuesday before the baby comes — that way I can let go of my class in good conscience. However, if it is to be sooner, that’s no problem — my Co-Instructor, Tova Rubin, has things well under control (and probably will do a better job with the class while I’m gone, than I usually do!).

  

Jan

Well, yesterday I finally found *the* outfit for bringing her home! It is absolutely adorable!!! It is a one-piece outfit with a white background, red ladybug pattern, and pink (!) and coral flowers on it. I know, I know, after I went on and on about how much I hate pink! But this isn’t *so* pink…of course, I did buy two other pink jumpers at the same time! Oh, well, I am blaming it on late-pregnancy psychosis, no doubt the precursor of what Craig “lovingly” refers to as MBD (maternal brain damage; I’ll let him explain more about this concept later). Did I mention the adorable matching hat and blanket?

Yesterday I was also sick for the first time in months – *not* fun! I have been on iron supplements, since I was anemic for a while, and was still low in iron last week. For some reason, the last few days the iron has been making me feel a little queasy when I take it at breakfast. But I hadn’t actually gotten sick until yesterday. I guess my tummy is just getting more fragile. I usually have a pretty small breakfast, so our hypothesis is that there isn’t enough in my stomach to absorb all the iron. I took the supplement with lunch today and it was fine.

Last night we rented the video “Coyote Ugly” – soft core porn masquerading as feminist empowerment flick. Actually, it was pretty entertaining. But it started me on an existential crisis – I’m never going to move to New York and dance on a bar! I’m about to be a MOM!!! I can’t just do whatever I want whenever I want to anymore. I’m getting old…

This morning I went in for my now-weekly checkup. I have started effacing a *little* bit, and the baby has *started* to drop, but not much progress yet. But, the doctor says I could still go into labor at any time – first babies are pretty unpredictable I guess. She did say the baby’s head is down, which is good. I am also supposedly doing something called “nesting” – I truly have no grasp of what this is, but it seems to involve the fact that I lost a pound this week (and I had last week, too – I am now only 11 pounds over where I started!).

Okay, time for our Wednesday night shows…has anyone else been sucked in by this “Temptation Island” show? I am ashamed to say we’re hooked – we might even *tape* West Wing so we can watch Temptation Island live! And you wonder why I’m having an existential crisis…. %-)

  

Jan

Yes. Mystefied describes it. Of course, I want our baby to look nice when she comes home, but I think we have lots of nice clothes for her already. Of course the real worry is that if we dress her up in a nice outfit, then I might need to clean out my car, and then …. Where might it all end? %-)

The baby watch is intense now — I think Leslie is now starting to appreciate what my oldest sister, Maia, told us — something to the effect that the 9th month is when you come to realize that mother nature has designed pregnancy to be about 1 month too long! Leslie’s back sure agrees, although her sense of “Readiness” might not.

  

Jan

Well, I guess maybe we won’t do this *every* day! %-) We had a great weekend just hanging out alone together – all the more important since it may well be our last “childless” weekend together, FOREVER!!! What an overwhelming thought!

We’ve been having quite the adventure trying to find the perfect “coming home” outfit for the baby. Well, I use “we” in kind of a loose sense – Craig has come with me (without complaint) to each of the stores, offered some very good suggestions (such as not to get a pants outfit because the waist band would hurt the baby’s belly button where the cord was), and gives honest opinions about the outfits we find; nevertheless, he seems kind of mystified by the concept that we need a special outfit for bringing the baby home from the hospital.

I’m no longer going to my office, but I am trying to work at home to get as much done as possible before the baby comes. Craig is scheduled to teach this week and next week, and then he will get some time off to spend with the baby and me – he starts teaching again after Vanderbilt’s Spring Break (mid-March). Of course, if she comes early, things will have to shift somewhat.

Otherwise, the waiting continues. I still haven’t packed my bag to take to the hospital – somehow that makes it seem so real! My back hurts a lot, and I am getting more uncomfortable in general, but it’s not unbearable (at least not yet). I still feel like I’m not ready, but I’m not sure I will feel ready at all before she’s here…

  

Jan

Now that we’re in the “home stretch” on this baby-thing, we thought it might be post daily updates on the goings-on in our household. This service is supposed to make it really easy to do. Let us know what you think!